Last week the family and I holidayed in Cornwall with my side of the family.
Every year we spend some time in the south of France with my wife’s side and some time in the UK with my side.
We had a lovely time.
The house that we’d rented had both a pool table and table football table.
So we created a league where all 12 of us would play each other at each game.
I was playing against my middle son when he accidentally knocked over a drink with his cue.
Amazingly, the glass didn’t smash.
But there was blackcurrant cordial all over the floor.
He immediately apologised and we mopped it up together.
He started apologising again and I told him that “It’s fine”.
And we had a conversation about how, when we make a mistakes, and immediately apologise, people usually are ok with it.
Sure, there’s an element of learning and, hopefully, being less likely to make the same mistake again.
But an immediate apology and dealing with the problem is always much better than trying to find some way to blame somebody else and not take responsibility for our actions.
I told him the story about when I first started dating my wife (his Step Mum).
At one of my early visits to her parents house, I dropped a bottle of wine on the kitchen floor and cracked a tile.
I immediately apologised and cleaned up the mess.
My now father-in-law got some tile putty and filled in the hole that had been created.
In both those cases it wasn’t so much what happened, it’s how we responded and what we made it mean that was key.
As is often the case.
When we over eat (or drink) then, realistically, it’s only going to be by a few thousand calories at most (if that).
An amount that can be very easily averaged out over the coming days.
It’s not what we’ve done, it’s how we then respond and what we make it mean.
If we decide that we have “failed”………
That we should “write off” the rest of the day / weekend / week or month……….
That there’s “something wrong with me”………
And use that as a justification to continue to a over consume for a longer period of time………
We’ll have very different consequences to just the initial over consumption followed by averaging out.
And it’s the same with a missed workout or anything else that we might see as “not ideal”.
It’s not what we’ve done, it’s how we then respond and what we make it mean.
Much love,
Jon ‘I won the table football league’ Hall
P.S. If you’re fed up of one step forward, two steps back then I have a proven track record of helping people make three steps forward, one step back progress. And helping them become ok with that becuase they’ve realised that continued forward progress rarely happens and sets them up for percevied failure. It’s www.myrise.co.uk/apply when you’re ready to accept that!
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RISE in Macclesfield was established in 2012 and specialise in Group Personal Training weight loss programmes for those that don’t like the gym and find diets boring and restrictive!
