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Here we go.
A day later than promised.
———– See the last couple of days blogs covering the ‘7 “big fat lies” you’ve been told about yourself’ and how the brain works if you’re not sure what I’m on about —————
Number 1.
“More positive thinking”
You’ll have heard this many times
Maybe told yourself it.
“I just need to think more positively” you might have said.
I’m sure you’ve seen countless memes about positive thinking over the years.
Did they help?
Does saying or reading or hearing that make you think more positively?
For anything other than a minute or two?
If anything, I’d say that we hear more about positive thinking than at any point in history…………..
But our average mood has never been worse.
Positive thinking can often feel like a lie.
Especially when we’re still in that ‘Protect’ stage and feeling ‘threat’ in some way.
We tell ourselves something we don’t really believe.
If anything our brain can’t close the loop.
It’s looking for those patterns in our past behaviours.
And it can’t see them.
It can keep us feeling stuck.
I’ve talked recently about changing what we say about situations.
But how the new thing we say has to, at the very least, show signs of becoming true.
If we feel that “nobody likes me” then telling ourselves “everybody likes me” probably isn’t going to help.
We feel that we’re “naturally shy” and “not very good at this” then telling ourselves “you’re a strong, confident person and you can do this” isn’t likely to ring true.
The only affirmations that work are the ones we already believe to be true (to a sufficient degree).
Truthful thinking beats positive thinking.
So, what can we do instead?
Three questions.
As I mentioned the other day.
Please actually try and ask these questions of a situation you’re struggling with.
Just nodding and going “interesting point by Jon (and Dax)” won’t change anything.
Actually asking these questions about that situation might just.
Or, at least, start to lead you in that direction.
1. Is what I’m doing currently working?
2. Is it likely to ever work?
3. Is there a better way to make it work?
Whether it’s related to work, your eating, exercise, personal relationships or anything else.
Just stop and take two minutes to actually ask those three questions of the situation.
———- And, maybe, take two minutes to go and apply for our programme and change your life for the cost of a take out coffee a day? –> www.myrise.co.uk/apply ———
Much love,
Jon ‘Tomorrow is ‘Develop stronger willpower” Hall
