I mentioned in yesterday’s blog that I learned two lessons from the situation 21 years ago where someone thought I was checking his bag because of the colour of his skin.
After we had a conversation the next time I saw him and he explained that his sister had died, it put some new context to his reaction.
And I realised that we rarely know what’s going on in someone’s life.
The challenges that they’re facing.
And, ever since, I’ve always tried to approach people’s reactions and what they say and do with a degree of empathy and understanding.
Another phrase I heard several years ago that I particularly like is that “Everyone’s doing their best with what they’ve got at that point”.
– No one’s “out to get us”.
– No one’s trying to make our life harder.
– No one’s looking to cause problems.
– No one’s “got it in for us”.
– No one’s “being a kn0b”.
People are just doing what they think is the right thing for them and those they care about at that point based on their experiences and how they’re feeling.
Now that doesn’t mean we automatically have to just accept other people’s behaviour if we’re not ok with it.
But when we understand it’s their thing, and it’s not really about us, it’s a game changer.
Life becomes much less something that “happens to us”………
We can stop feeling a victim of circumstance and others’ behaviour…….
And focus more on what we can change and do (such as going to www.myrise.co.uk/apply in what many have called “one of the best decision I ever made”).
Much love,
Jon ‘s out’ Hall
P.S. There’s a school of thought that can break down the way we interpret what happens to us, and life in general, into what can be considered “Four levels of consciousness”. I’ve kind of started covering the first two here. I’ll expand tomorrow.
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RISE in Macclesfield was established in 2012 and specialise in Group Personal Training weight loss programmes for those that don’t like the gym and find diets boring and restrictive!