When I was younger, so much younger than today

I never needed anybody’s help in any way

But now these days are gone, I’m not so self assured

Now I find I’ve changed my mind and opened up the doors


These are, of course, the opening lyrics to ‘Help’ by The Beatles.


It’s also something we covered in Monday’s Coaching Day sessions.


Asking people for help.


Actually asking them.


Very few people in your life will actually say no when asked.


But we often best about the bush with it.


We give them conflicting information too.


Those people that keep offering your cake, biscuits, beer, etc.


We say we don’t want them.


But then we back down.


Which just serves to teach them that we do want them.


We just need to be asked a few times.


So that’s what they do next time.




Imagine if the conversation went something more like this:


You: “Hey, I was wondering if I could ask you a favour?”


Friend: “Yeah, sure.”


You: “Well, I’m sure you’ve notice that I’ve been trying to live more healthily and lose weight recently.”


Friend: “Of course.”


You: “The thing is, I want to stop eating cakes and biscuits and work, but I’m really bad at saying no when you offer them to me. Might you be able to help me out by not offering me them so I don’t have to make that choice? I’d really appreciate it.”


What do you think your friend (or colleague or whoever) will then say?


I’d b surprised if they said no.


If they then forget and do offer it you, just ask if they can still keep helping them as you’ve really appreciate what they’ve done so far.


Change the wording dependant on the situation.


It might be about alcohol, stress, sleep or anything else you find other people make more difficult.


Ask them and we’d be amazed if they said no.



Much love,


Jon ‘Q&A’ Hall and Matt ‘T&A’ Nicholson

Jon Hall
Jon Hall

When not helping people to transform their lives and bodies, Jon can usually be found either playing with his kids or taxi-ing them around. If you'd like to find out more about what we do at RISE then enter your details in the box to the right or bottom of this page or at myrise.co.uk - this is the same way every single one of the hundreds who've described this as "one of the best decisions I've ever made" took their first step.