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The other week, my two oldest sons wanted to watch a film with me.
Younger brother was floating around between us and mum and sister, so I wanted something that he’d be OK watching too.
Most of their suggestions were a bit old for him.
After a quick Google I was reminded of Groundhog Day.
The 1993 classic starring Bill Murray.
Where “Phil, a self-centred weatherman, goes to the town of Punxsutawney for an assignment. He is later shocked when he wakes up the next morning and realises that he is reliving the same day over and over.”
I didn’t pick it for it’s parallels to the current situation.
But there, of course, are some.
Most days at the moment can feel like that, can’t they?
It can all feel a bit of a drag.
Too ‘samey’.
If we let it.
A fairly high proportion of what we’re doing at the moment can feel particularly challenging because there’s been so much of it.
And so little of certain other things.
But………
If we choose to take each individual thing in front of us at that point………
To treat it in isolation………
To divorce it from things in the past or potential future………
To make a choice to just give this moment what it needs……..
It can become a different conversation in our heads.
We’re just working on something.
Or relaxing by doing something.
We’re just doing that thing that’s in front of us right now.
We’re in that moment.
Things that came before it and might come later only have to influence our feelings about what’s happening in the current moment if we allow them to.
The past is nothing but a present time memory with our imagination filling in most of the gaps and all of the meaning.
The future isn’t anything.
Just our thoughts in the present.
I’m not saying this will go down as anyone’s favourite time of their life.
I’d be happy to put the last year 41st out of my 41 years of life.
But, that doesn’t mean we can’t change our focus on it somewhat.
And it’s not that we should never think about the past or future.
But there’s definitely diminishing returns on the benefits.
And a point that it becomes detrimental.
Like anything, it’s a skill.
Something we get better at with practice.
Without realising it, we’ve probably trained ourselves in the opposite direction.
Because we didn’t realise it was an option.
Just what everyone seemed to be doing.
What seemed to be ‘normal’.
The influence of our peer group and media (social or otherwise).
We trained our mind to be good at living in the past and / or future.
We can train it to be good at just being in the moment.
Where, most of the time, everything is ok.
Much love,
Jon ‘War clouds have blacked out parts of the shadow’ Hall