I was talking to a couple of members in one of our MIND Time sessions yesterday morning (see here).
One of the things we discussed was the thought process they have (as do a lot of people) where they ‘fall of the wagon’ or their day / weekend / week is ‘a write off’.
I explained to them, as I often do in such situations, the concept of ‘dichotomous thinking’.
It’s a concept first introduced to me by my ex-wife, a doctor, who at that time was working in psychiatric health and consequently knew / knows a lot about how the minds worlds.
It’s refers to the thought process of something being one extreme or the other.
Black or white.
With no ‘shades of grey’ in between.
It’s a thought process that many of us have and we are, to a degree, often brought up to think this way.
I’ve found from experience that it seems to occur more strongly in women.
I don’t know if this is something about the female brain, or if it is more to do with the different expectations placed on girls in their youth to be ‘perfect’.
But it happens plenty in men too.
It often starts in the playground – “she’s my best friend” or “she’s a bitch”.
It carries on as we age.
Over done veg can “ruin” a perfectly nice meal.
Having one slice of cake means the weekend is a “write off” and you may as well have 10.
That first drink seems to open a flood gate.
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Just telling you about this thought process won’t necessarily mean you’ll change anything straight away.
But, hopefully, being more aware of it will start to plant a seed of thought in your head.
You may continue to do the same things.
But if you’re aware that you are using ‘dichotomous thinking’ will help you start to think about how you might change things next time.
Bit by bit, you may find that you’re able to put these things in a bit more perspective.
See the shades of grey.
Realise that it was just ‘one slice’ or just ‘one drink’.
Hope it helps – let me know in the box below if you have any questions 🙂
Much love,
Jon “50 shades” Hall
